Nearly Famous
by Hon-doroboo Xanthros
Summary: Inuyasha and Miroku - Live on Ramen, play music (to afford Ramen), On a Mission From Glod! Yes, Glod!
1. Heartbreaker

'Allo. For no apparent reason, I decided to write this. My inspiration... nothing! Actually, it was prolly that cheese I ate... anyway, this isn't a rambling monologue about stale cheese, so let's get to the point. I need reviews, cuz I currently am making up the story on the spot, and don't have a clue if it's good or not.

Disclaimer: If I had money, I'd own stuff besides Led Zeppelin CDs and my Eagles tickets. Such as rights to Inuyasha.

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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Heartbreaker^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 

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Bent metal scarred the gravel, as the blues Cobra Mustang's fender pushed right through to the inside of the car. Inuyasha surveyed the crash.

"This was brand new! I had just gotten it! How could this happen again?!"

His was the car on the _other _side of the road. Yeah, that's right, the brand used Honda Civic, that had bounced off a tree, rolled over 7 times, stopped upside down, and, when it stopped burning, would officially be considered "Totaled."

"Well, maybe I can get it fixed..."

The door fell off.

"DAMNIT!"

Meanwhile, the owner of the mustang got out and walked to the front of his car. He was tall, wore black leather, blue jeans, and generally was the type of person you think you'll see again later in the story.

"Inuyasha."

"What? How'd you know my name?"

"You should be more alert. Most people would make you pay for the damages."

Inuyasha looked around. More so, he looked confused.

"You're not gonna make me pay?"

"No. You can't afford a new car anyway. Just pretend this never happened. You hit a tree."

"Umm... ok." _At least I'll still be able to eat,_ he thought, considering his funds which were less than non-existent, and floated around in their own little negative reality somewhere out of his reach.

"I'll call a tow truck for you, and pay for it myself. Don't report this to the police."

"Sure. Whatever. Thanks, man."

The owner of the Mustang got in his smashed up car, and I guess it was in somewhat working condition, because it didn't blow up. In a few minutes, a tow truck came, and brought Inuyasha to the station.

"Hey, that must've been a nasty crash. Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I had my tray table up, my seat back in the upright position, and the no smoking sign had been turned on. Oh, yeah, and I was wearing a seatbelt."

"Alright then, Inuyasha. You can go. The bill was already paid."

"What the? How does everyone know my name?"

"Err... it's on your license plate?"

"Oh. Yeah."

He walked off toward home, muttering, "Yeah... I knew that."

When he was about halfway there, he stopped, and frantically ran back to the tow station, screaming, "Hey! What about my door!"

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!- NEXT DAY -!

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When Inuyasha woke up he did NOT feel happy. And it was Monday. And when he called his friend to ask him for a ride to work, his friend laughed at his beaten down car... That made it better. No, seriously. When he got to work, which was a small recording studio, he sat back and looked at the appointment book. No one scheduled for... 15 minutes. Damn.

"Inuyasha, Miroku! You're late again!" Kagome, their manager, yelled.

"Sorry!" they both said quickly.

"Well, don't do it again, I'd hate to have to fire you, no one else in this town can make music."

They smiled. Yeah, Kagome owned the studio, but they all knew that if she fired them, she wouldn't get any business.

The door opened to the lobby. Everyone went out to meet the band. A typical four piece rock outfit. Three guys, and a female singer. That's about all the diversity they had. They all shook hands, and when Inuyasha shook the singer's hand, he looked into her eyes. She Seemed vaguely familiar...

__

Well it's been ten years, or maybe more,

since I first set eyes on you,

He tried to think. He went back, years and years, and ducks, and years, and... yeah.

__

The best years of my life gone by,

Here I am alone and blue,

She reminded him of a girl he knew in High school. She was different than her, he thought, but that face...

__

Her style is new, but the face the same,

as it was so long ago,

He looked again into her eyes. She smiled politely.

__

But from her eyes, a different smile,

like that of one who knows,

She coughed.

"Uhh... heh. Sorry... !" Inuyasha said, embarrassed.

"Well," said Kagome, "let's get into the recording room!"

The band went ahead and followed Kagome into a room filled with cables and foam on the walls, with a big glass window that showed a room full of Mixers and audio equipment. Inuyasha and Miroku stayed behind a little.

"Dude..." Miroku said.

"Yeah, I know."

"Dude... she's scary."

Inuyasha was silent.

"Inuyasha, Miroku!"

"Be right there, Kagome!"

When they got into the room, they made formal introductions.

"This is John, that's Jean-Paul, I'm Jimmy, and that's Annie," said the Lead guitarist, the English accent dripping off his tongue.

Kagome introduced them, starting with Inuyasha, Miroku, and then herself.

__

Hey fellas have you heard the news?

You know that Annie's back in town,

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!- LUNCH TIME -!

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__

It won't take long just to watch and see,

How the fellas lay their money down,

A folded twenty hit the counter.

At the Sad Café, the favourite lunch spot for musicians in the area, sat Inu and Miroku.

Time to eat.

"Mmmmm... chicken."

"Yeah, nothin' like a.... wait, what? We're eating a pepperoni pizza!"

"Oh. Yeah. Whatever."

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!- LATER-ISH -!

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The band was getting ther amps and instruments together. As they left, Inuyasha felt a wave of relief. He then went back home, got his bass, and he and Miroku went to the Cosmo A Go-Go to play a gig. They only worked at the studio during the day because they were too poor to live off of their music. They could barely afford the Ramen they ate everyday. But it was all good, cuz they... no, not really. It kinda sucked. Someday, people would realize good music again. Like Led Zeppelin.

They got onstage, and launched right into their cover of "Rock and Roll Band."

Annie was sitting at a table near the back. Well, actually kinda closer to the middle, slightly to the left, supposing, of course, that you're coming from the snack bar. She was sitting with a tall man wearing black leather, who obviously appears again later. They were conversing casually, laughing at some private joke.

At break, Inuyasha went over to the snack bar and got a super-large order of chili cheese fries. On the house, because he was playing there tonight. Jeez, come on people, did you really think he could afford chili cheese fries? He was in a good mood, ruined only by the remembrance of his car crash. The remembrance of his car. Then it hit him, like a sack of burning Thermite to the face. Totaled, burning Honda Civic, $700 Bose speaker system (don't ask), custom paint job. Oh yeah, and some other car, somewhere. But that didn't matter. All that money in speakers!

He went over to Annie and the tall leather dude.

"I remember you!" he said.

"Uhh... yeah. I was just at your studio, like 2 hours ago."

"Good point. But besides that! You totaled my car in 12th grade!"

"Oh! I remember. I'm really sorry."

"I don't care about the car! You killed that speaker system! That was like... all my money... for a really long time!" He screamed, trying to sound indignant.

By now, half the place was giving him odd sidelong looks and edging away. Now you know why they have backstage rooms for musicians.

"Yeah, umm, I'm sorry about that-" Annie stuttered.

She was cut off by Inuyasha's fanatical raving. He seemed to be saying something barely comprehensible about Russia, oppression, a parading around with people's heads onna stick.

Right about when he was in the middle of the righteous political outrage, Annie tried to surreptitiously withdraw from the premises. She tripped over a chair, which proceeded to break, toppling over a table, and taking two guests with it. Inuyasha was so caught up in his speech that he didn't notice anyways, and fifteen minutes later, the manager asked for a word with him. Another ten minutes in his office, and Inuyasha, Miroku, and their band were officially banned from the Cosmo A Go-Go.

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!- LATER-ISH THAN LAST TIME -!

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Driving back in Miroku's car, with that familiar Led Zeppelin classic (but arent they all?) blasting. The wise words of Robert Plant rang in their ears as they sped down the highway...

__

Go away, heartbreaker...

Heartbreaker,

Heartbreaker,

Heartbreaker,

Heart-

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Yeah... I wrote this instead of my English essay, and it was a lot more fun, believe me. It's my first fanfic, and I kinda lotsa reviews. Especially on developing Kagome's Character. So... Go review, damnit! Stop reading this, it's irrelevant! Oh... whatever. By the way, you all should definitely read Ama (Shades of Oblivion's fic Kinetics. It's cool, so, read it. Ka-bob.

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Beta Tester's Notes: 

Yo! Guess who? You're probably wrong, but anyway, it's Ama (Shades of Oblivion! I'm here to tell you that I just spent the past day beta-reading, editing, and retyping this for a friend (his damned Microsoft word was getting screwy with the posts). I stand before you, a broken, and miserable man. So, if you're all getting angry about why I haven't updated yet, blame Hon, it's his fault. Maybe. J/k, anywho, later!


	2. Ziggy Stardust

This was a chapter I just had to write. It was kind of a joke, but it's not too bad. I assure you I will add more characters you recognize in the next chapter, and some more cool-er stuff. Sooo…here goes. And I still need reviews for cryin' out loud!

DISCLAIMER: The material herein, is, undoubtedly, inarguably, most obviously content owned by the sole or many owners, in part or in whole, of Inuyasha and all rights therein. These rights are in no way connected to myself, and if I violate upon them, let it be known that I, the writer of this document, do not, in any way, in part or in whole, own, posess, or claim to own or posess, rights to Inuyasha and all related materials in content.

IN OTHER WORDS: I'm poor, and I own a bagel, and my Eagles tickets. My Led Zeppelin CDs were repossessed by the government. I bought a bagel with the change I found on the street but I STILL don't own Inuyasha. ^_^

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Inuyasha Takagami woke up in the middle of a David Bowie CD.

"Holy crap! I set that alarm to start at the beginning of the CD!"

Another day, another alarm to sleep in on.

Half an hour later, Inuyasha was ready to go. Today was Saturday, which meant instead of getting a day off, he tried to make extra money. Today, he had a Battle of the Bands to perform in, and the grand prize was $5,000 and a year's supply of Ramen. God, how he wanted that Ramen.

The Battle started at 11:00, but he wasn't playing till 4:00. He got there at 11, signed in, and then went back to his house to get his stuff and call Miroku, who had beaten the living hell out of yet another alarm clock just last Thursday. He couldn't afford the clock in the first place, never mind a new one. Miroku got Ed, the drummer, and they all met Inuyasha at The Place. Yeah, some idiot had named the place The Place. Which place you ask? Well, the place (or was it The Place?) that was hosting the Battle of the Bands.

They got there just as a band finished their set.

"Dude, Them is up now. And after them, is Us." Miroku said.

"What?! We're not supposed to play until 4!" Inuyasha practically yelled.

"We aren't. But Them is gonna play, then Us, and after Us is Surreptitious Fabric, then a few more bands, and THEN we play."

"Hold on. I'm getting a headache. Time for some Artificial Ramen Substitute*"

Miroku started "mingling" with the crowd. He did an awful lot of "mingling" with the female population, and it earned him a few smacks. Okay, a LOT of smacks. Okay, so he was beaten senseless and left on the floor, nearly unconscious staring up a girl's skirt with an innocent look on his face.

They waited until the band finished. Then the announcer came on.

"That was Them, and this…is Us!"

Half the crowd got confused and tripped over a small gopher. The other half the crowd got a headache and tried to eat the small gopher. The other half of the crowd and the gopher said "What the hell is a gopher doing in this fic?!" and then proceeded to write an intellectually stimulating thesis on the social power of gophers in the Feudal Age.

Surprisingly, no form of conflagration interrupted the concert until The Whom played, in which case the audience was showered with bass drum confetti. Many people cheered, and many went deaf. In any case, it was a grand display of what happens when stupid people get their hands on gunpowder.

"Hey, there's that guy who I crashed into on the highway and has been showing up in the story ever since. What's his band called?" Said Inuyasha.

"Uhh…here it is. The _what_?"

"What is it??"

"Err…oh my God. Here, you look."

"Meep!"

"Yeah. Is that legal?"

"I dunno. What does it say for his name in the profile?"

"Aladdin Sane. But it says that he 

changed his name to Ziggy after the release of his fifth album.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"At any rate…"

Just then they saw Kagome in the crowd. When Inuyasha caught her staring at him she flushed and immediately looked away. Inuyasha walked over to her.

"So, came to see the Battle?" He said.

"Yeah. Actually, I came to see someone certain play…"

"Who? Is it that guy over there by the bar?"

Kagome sighed exasperatedly.

"Yeah. That must be it."

"Oh! _I _get it. I never thought..."

"What?" Kagome said, a little too quickly, and a little embarrassed.

"You came to see Miroku play. I can see right through you. You can't keep secrets from me."

Once again, Kagome sighed a mix of a lot exasperation and a little relief. She looked over at Miroku, and caught him putting his hand farther and farther down some girl's back. The girl turned around, and looked at him in angry surprise. She took one look at his innocent smile, and looked around for another culprit. Then she decked him.

"Whatever." Kagome said.

The battle continued. The audience voted. It came time for Inuyasha's 

band. They got up onstage and the blindingly blinding light blindly blinded them. So their first song was a cover of Manfred Mann's cover of Bruce Springsteen's "Blinded By The Light."

The fact that Inuyasha (who sung) even knew the words to that mumbo-jumbo got them extra points.

Then they did a cover of Stillwater's "You Had To Be There." After that they played a few of their own songs and got offstage. About here the dialog went like this:

"Dude (OW!!) I can't see any-(OW!!)-thing!"

"Yeah. Hold on-" (trips over cables) "Jeez!" (kicks amplifier in) "Ouch, that's gonna cost some Raman money…"

"They need to turn those lights down…hey! I didn't hit anything this-" (BAM!) "Holy CRAP! Run like hell!"

"What was it?"

"I dunno, but it was loud and big, and it blew up! ….Hell, it might have even exploded!!"

"We're off the stage…but we're like five-"

"Three, sir"

"Yes, three blocks away."

"No…there's the door."

"Oh. Ok."

"Well that was…interesting."

"Yeah. Let's go see how well we did."

They re-entered The Place, and they looked at the scoreboard. A shot of boos went around. No, scratch that, a shot of booze went around. They had tied for first…50 points above everyone else! They looked at the scoreboard to see who they had tied with.

"Ahh! Shield your eyes!"

"It's…it's…I can't bring myself to say it!!"

"Get the women and children out! Bar the doors! Don't wait for me, I might not come out!"

"It's…let's just say…Ziggy's band…"

"Oh, the horror! The eeevil, terrible horror!"

"God save us!"

Several men took their own life. Other men took the life of other people. Some of the men held up a corner store for a box of Life. One man even had the novel idea to eat it. All in all, when they were done 7 local corner stores and supermarkets had been held up and raided by a Life-hungering crowd with pitchforks.

Then the announcer came on.

"Due to recent events and circumstances beyond our control, I'm afraid there is no Life cereal left in the country."

This was met with an angry crowd screaming words that I'd rather not repeat.

"But tomorrow, the Battle Of The Bands will continue! The top five-"

"Three, sir."

"-yes, three bands will compete tomorrow, playing five-"

"Three, sir."

"-yes, three cover songs of their choice, and five-"

"Three, sir."

"-yes, three original songs."

Inuyasha's band left, and Inuyasha went with Miroku to a bar.

I assure you, they were over 21.

No, really, I mean it.

They went to the Cosmo A Go-Go. Upon entering, the waitress screamed, and they were forcefully taught a lesson on the Unabridged English Dictionary's definition of the word "banned" by the security guards.

They ambled down the road, as much as you can amble in a car, and found a bar by the name of (????). 

Sitting down at on a friendly bar stool never felt so good. They found themselves next to Ziggy.

"Hey man! Nice job at the battle!" Miroku said, energetically.

"Yeah. You guys did well yourselves."

"Have you been a musician all your life? Cuz, you're kinda old to be starting now." Inuyasha said.

"Yeah, I've had some experience. You could say I made a living."

"Cool! Us, too. This is so great! We keep getting more popular, and now our second album is starting to sell."

"Yeah? You got to be careful. If I were you, I'd just turn around, and be a lawyer or something."

They looked at him puzzledly.

"But I can tell by your face that you won't."

He continued.

"Well, I'll see you guys later."

He left the building, leaving their spirits strangely dampened. The watched as he walked out into the cool night and got in his car. They watched as he drove away. Then they ordered another round.

Miroku was the first to speak.

"Oookaaay….whatever."

"Yeah. He seems to have gotten much more odd."

"I know. What secret does he have that he didn't want the police to 

know anyway?"

"I dunno. Prolly didn't wanna go through all the crap of getting me to pay and stuff. His car wasn't hurt that bad anyway."

"Probably." Miroku said, but you could tell he didn't believe it.

They had a bite to eat (namely, the closest thing to Ramen they had there) and left. With music blasting, they headed home. They went to Inuyasha's house, only to find it trashed and apparently nearly lit on fire. As they walked in part of the ceiling fell in. There was a note attached to the…remains of the refrigerator. It said:

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Ziggy played guitar

Jamming good with Weird and Gilly

And the Spiders From Mars

He played it left hand

But made it too far

Became the special man

Then we were Ziggy's band

They looked at this and if they has said their thoughts out loud, it would have gone something along the lines of this:

"That HAS to be THE cheesiest freakin' way to make a point."

"A NOTE on the freakin' REFRIGERATOR?? What the hell is that?"

They scrounged around upstairs for anything undamaged, and found this on a piece of paper in Inu's bedroom:

__

Making love to his ego

Ziggy sucked up into his mind

Like a leper messiah

When the kids had killed the man I had to break up the band

Oh

Ziggy played guitar

They pieced this to what Ziggy had said to them earlier. Damn him! He was trying to keep them from winning the Battle Of The Bands! Worse yet, he was keeping them from their Ramen!!

So they spent the night at Miroku's house, which wasn't trashed. (That's what Inuyasha gets for being the main character).

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!- NEXT MORNING -!

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Inuyasha and Miroku woke up to the sound of David Bowie. They didn't remember setting that as their alarm. Whatever.

Wait, Miroku didn't have an alarm.

They hurried to get dressed and got together with Ed at The Place.

''You ready for this?'' asked Miroku.

''Yeah.''

''Alright. Get ready to win this one!''

''For the Ramen!''

''For the Ramen!''

They walked in the door and into the backstage room to see Ziggy with his band.

"Hey! Good luck out there." Ziggy said as if nothing had happened.

"Yeah." Miroku said darkly, and calmly restrained Inuyasha.

Inuyasha composed himself and walked past Ziggy without looking at him. He had no evidence Ziggy had been the one who trashed his house. Yet.

The first band went on first (duh) and to be quite frank, they sucked. The guitarist electrocuted himself on the microphone while going for backup vocals, and then their manager got into a fight with The Place's owner. To make a long story short, the band bought a gate. The 

announcer came on.

"I'm afraid the band 'Unmoving Hydrogen And Oxygen Compound' has been disqualified. Next up is Nearly Famous."

Inuyasha, Miroku, and Ed, walked out on stage. The drummer hit a beat, and then the band played two original songs and a cover. After they had finished their cover of "Telephone Line" the lights went dim, and a strobe light flashed on Miroku, the guitarist, who played a heavy power chord. As the chord faded, the lights went almost completely out and the drummer started the intro to "Fever Dog" by Stillwater. The lights gradually light up, and soon the band was bathed in warm light. Inuyasha, who was singing, sparkled and seemed to be on invisible fire. His ears were easily noticed, and his fangs stood out, but in the middle of the song, the audience didn't even question it. It did look like some stage makeup, like a costume. As the crowd quieted to a dull roar, they started on another original song, and then one last cover of "Tangerine" by Led Zeppelin. The audience was left in awe and was still cheering after they had gone offstage. Eventually they calmed back down. The announcer came on, not revealing any hints, but they were all sure that the judges had given them a near-perfect score.

"The next band, called ...oh my God...not that! Nooooooo........!'"

A moment or two passed.

''I'm sorry for the inconvenience. The announcer has spontaneously died-"

A voice in the background

"I'm not dead!"

"I'm afraid the announcer has suffered a fatal wound and-"

"I'm getting better!"

"Hold on."

"Aaarrghh!!"

Another moment passed.

"Well, without further ado, here's….err….the next band!"

Guitar blared, the lights went out. The drums came in. Suddenly, pyrotechnics (fancy word for pretty things that blow up) blazed and the spotlight was on Ziggy, who had died his hair bright red.

He played left hand acoustic guitar. The crowd went wild, and they played three covers. Then, smoke engulfed the stage and Ziggy emerged with an electric guitar. They launched into two of their hardest rocking original songs, and then stopped for a minute. They cut the smoke and effects, and Ziggy came on the stage.

"I'd like to dedicate this next song to Inuyasha."

He played the first chords of "Ziggy Stardust" with pure energy, the tones ringing with raw power. Inuyasha looked startled then angry. Now he was sure Ziggy had trashed his house. He contained himself, and decided to have a "talk" with him after the show.

The crowd, especially the judges, looked at Ziggy in confusion. "Ziggy Stardust" wasn't an original song…it had been done many years ago by a great musician. When he was finished, the announcer came on to disqualify him.

"I'm sorry, but Ziggy and his band are disqualified for playing more than three cover songs, and only two original songs."

Ziggy had some more to say, however, because he was still onstage with the microphone.

"Friends and rockers," he started, "you are the lucky lot of people who have seen the latest, and last, tour of the old rock star you see in front of you.

The audience issued a kind of collective breath. They caught on, and some of the fans went wild.

He continued.

"I have seen talent and music all across the country. Let me tell you, 99% of what passes for rock and roll these days...silence is more compelling. But here I have seen the last true rock and roll band. The last true music. Not what you hear on MTV and not the latest band appearing in concert with a pop singer or some rap 'artist'. Inuyasha has endured tough times. Like his car. And house. And what did he do it for? I'll bet he can sum it up in one word. What is it, Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha walks up to the stage. Solemnly, he takes the microphone and looks into the crowd.

"Ramen."

There was silence.

"Wow. You're even more of a musician than I thought you were." Ziggy continued, "And thus, ladies and gentlemen, the evening is over. We hope you all enjoyed yourselves,"

"And we'll see you all again next year." Inuyasha finished.

"Good evening!" They finished together.

Ziggy left, and Inuyasha followed him.

"So, did you really crash into my car and trash my house just to name me 'official cool musician'?

"No.............yeah."

"Like what?" Inuyasha asked, almost sarcastically. "20 minutes ago out here and I would have killed you."

"Like the fortune I'm giving to you."

"Me?" Inuyasha asked skeptically.

"Yeah."

By the time Inuyasha paid all the taxes, he had enough to pay for his house and get a brand new Honda Civic. He won the Battle of the Bands, and there was much rejoicing. And the people did feast upon the lambs, and the sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and large-

I'm sorry for that. The person in charge of narration has been sacked. And, finally, the eating of the Ramen commenced. All the Life was returned to the corner stores, and nobody took anyone's life for quite a while after.

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*Artificial Ramen Substitute: A food I made up, that I hope will be availible in the future. It is much like Ramen, but is, of course, artificial, and (oh my God) actually costs less. Yes, that's right, less. You can live for four years on Ramen with only $400…that's cheap. Artificial Ramen Substitute is for the musician who can't even afford that (like me!).

Wow! I can't believe I wrote 10 pages…crazy.Yeah, a lot of these are gonna be songfics. I'd like to say this is because music is my greatest influence or something cheesy like that, but we both know that it's cause my storyline would be weak without the songs. Oh yeah, and music IS my biggest influence. Ahem. The next chapter is almost done, and it'll be better than this, more characters, less plain old screwed up stuff. And less ripping off Monty Python And The Holy Grail. If you read this, and don't review, I'm gonna have to kill ya. Yeah. So…review dammit!


	3. Telephone Line

Nearly Famous

Chapter 3

Hey! Here's the part of the story where we get a plot. Whee! Anyways, this is probably gonna be a long chapter, cuz I'm trying to put a lot of stuff in here. Hope it turns out good! If you read this, then review it. Even if all you say is that you read it and it was cool (or it sucked ass, either way, TELL ME!).

Don't worry, I'll put Lynyrd Skynyrd in a chapter later!

DISCLAIMER: For some odd reason, the gods have not smiled upon me, and I have yet to own Inuaysha. But hear me...I will have vengeance!

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After the celebrating (or rejoicing, even) of the night before, Inuyasha and Miroku were wiped out. When they woke up at 12:30 they realized that, even though it was a workday, Kagome hadn't called. She hadn't even come down and beaten them with a stick (which happened quite often). Inuyasha commented on his gratefulness.

"Feh. Stupid girl."

"Mwfjbwmmfd." Was Miroku's response, momentarily witholding his automatic interest in the word "girl".

Neither of them were awake, and so they hadn't noticed Kagome standing there with a stick.

"I was GOING to let you sleep, baka!" She yelled, and really HAD looked as if she was going to leave them alone.

"Mmf."

Inuyasha sat up like a zombie. He looked around and saw Kagome. For a minute they looked at each other with a remarkable compassion.

And Inuyasha was quite able to remark at it. It went something like this:

"Moron."

FWAP

"OW!!"

"Why did I ever hire you two?" She said in exasperation.

"What?" Miroku asked innocently.

^^^^^^^^^^^^

LATER IN STUDIO

^^^^^^^^^^^^

Some band, Heavy Metal Balloon or something, was recording. Kagome was staring at Inuyasha blankly.

"What are you looking at?"

''Err...nothing...I mean, making sure you don't mess anything up. You never can trust an incompetent baka, you know.''

"Nani?! Feh. If you're going to insult me, it's your studio..."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Inuyasha turned some knobs, slid some sliders, and rearranged some cables. There was an odd noise from the studio, and the headphones Inuyasha had put down made a sound suspiciously like "meep!" and imploded.

The singer for the band screamed in an odd, off-tone, high voice. It never came back down. The rest of the band was so drugged up, they didn't notice.

Kagome stared in disbelief.

"Feh. That'll teach you."

Kagome looked at the band. She started to apologize and make up a lie about a mess-up in the studio equipment. They left, and, to make a long story short, Kagome yelled at Inuyasha until she couldn't talk, and then kicked him until he and Miroku left.

"And don't come back!"

"Feh. Why would I want to?"

FWAP

"Ow!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Kagome's house

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

__

Hello

How are you?

Have you been alright?

"Really? That's great! When?" Kagome exclaimed over the phone.

__

All those lonely, lonely, lonely, lonely nights

That's what I'd say

I'll tell you everything

"Tomorrow!" An excited female voice said.

"That's great! See you then!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Inuyasha's House

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

__

Hey

How you feeling?

"Really? That's great! When?" Inuyasha nearly exclaimed over the phone.

__

Are you still the same

Don't you realize

The things we did, we did

"Tomorrow!" An unintimidatingly small male voice said.

__

Were for real, not a dream

I just can't believe

They've never faded out of view

"That's great! See you then!"

Inuyasha was walking away when the phone rang again.

He wearily went to answer it.

"Hello, is there a Mr. Takagami th-"

Inuyasha hung up.

"Damn telemarketers."

Inuyasha walked outside.

Kagome walked outside

They both looked up at the sky, unaware at the same time.

__

I look into the sky

-The little things are finally coming true

And I wonder why

-The love you need ain't gonna see through

Inuyasha started to walk down the street. He supposed he was going to the car dealership to buy his new car (with his new money!). As he was walking, he was thinking (which is another rare thing for a musician to do). He was halfway there, and saw a phone booth. On impulse he found himself walking toward it...when he got there he picked the phone off the hook. And twenty seconds later, he heard a familiar voice. And ya know what it said? It said, "If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If hang up and then dial your operator." So, he hung up, and dialed the operator, because he realized, that for as long as he'd known Kagome, he didn't have her phone number. He talked with the operator (who was a total ass), and a few minutes later, he was calling Kagome, and he didn't know why.

"Hello?" She answered.

"Uhh..hi."

"Who is this?"

"Uhh...Inuyasha."

__

Oh, telephone line

"Hmph."

__

Give me some time

"No, don't hang up!"

"What is it?"

__

I'm living in twilight

"Err...I just wanted to say..."

"Well?"

"I guess...I'm sorry."

"Honto?"

"Yeah...uhh. I probably shouldn't have done that."

"Well...thanks. So, are you going to pay for it?"

"Heh, yeah. All you have to do, is take the cable out of channel 3 input on the 64 channel mixer, and put the cable from the preamp input into channel 4 of the analog mixer."

Kagome managed to make her silence sound confused.

"I'll fix it tomorrow." Inuyasha said and hung up.

Inuyasha kept on walking. 'Why did I do that?', he wondered.

When he got to the dealership, he had to stop again and try to remember why he was there. "Oh yeah!" He thought.

He walked up to the main desk.

"I'd like to buy a Civic." He said flatly.

"Well...would you like to test-drive it first?"

"No."

"Ok...then sign these papers, and go to the desk in the back."

"All right..."

He walked back to the other desk. He paid for the car in cash, all $100s, in packs of $10,000. Needless to say, he got a few strange looks and more than a few people slowly backing away.

He got the keys and drove out of the parking lot. As he was waiting to turn onto the road, at least three, if not five, birds promptly took a crap on his, hood, windshield, and roof, respectably.

"Dammit!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

LATER-ISH

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Inuyasha picked up the phone.

"Hello?" He asked.

"Yes, I'm looking for a Mr. Takagami, is he home."

"Look, whatever you're selling, I don't want any." 

And with that, he hung up. He was leaving, and then looked at the caller ID (Yes, he can barely afford it at $5 a month). It said the caller was from Rolling Stone. He ran to the phone and dialed the number.

The phone rang for a while.

__

Okay, so no one's answering

But can't you just let it ring a little longer

The phone rang a few more times.

__

I'll just sit tight

In shadows of the night

And let it ring for evermore

Finally, someone picked up.

"Hi, this is Rolling Stone-"

Inuyasha cut the receptionist off.

"This is Inuyasha Takagami. You just called?"

Hold on...Takagami...here. Ok, I'll put you on another line."

The voice that called him earlier answered.

"Is this Mr. Takagami?"

"Yes."

"This is Ben Fong-Torres."

"The editor of Rolling Stone Magazine??"

"No, the other Ben Fong-Torres."

"Heh. Good one. What does Rolling Stone Magazine want with me?"

"No, sir, I wasn't being sarcastic. I'm a manager of a large recording label, Rolling Stone Records. We want to produce your next album, and we also would like to arrange for you to go on tour."

Inuyasha was dumbfounded. Speechless.

"Uhh...Mr. Takagami?"

"Er, yes. All right.

  
"So, how is it for you if you started the tour...say, Wednesday?"

"Umm...today's Sunday...yeah, that's fine."

"Actually, it's Monday."

"How'd it get to be....Monday, huh. Okay."

"All right! I'll mail you a list of gigs and their dates overnight. If you can't do any, notify me personally on Wednesday."

"Ok, Mr. Fong-Torres."

"You have my number, call me when you get to each gig, and make sure you tell me if you can play it or not. It could cause lawyer hell if you don't play a gig and don't notify the owner."

"Got it."

"Think about it. A tour. Crazy."

"Crazy"

And with that Ben hung up and left Inuyasha standing there as if in a dream.

"Whoa. A tour. Crazy." He said. He was in so much shock that you could have stuck a pair of scissors through his squiddleyspooch and he wouldn't have noticed.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

NEXT DAY

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Kagome woke up, albeit against her will. She...well, I guess you could say smashed the alarm clock, but what she did was much more painful to it. It made Miroku's completely dead alarms look easily fixable.

"Bleh. I don't wanna work."

Then it dawned on her: yes, that's right. The sun came up.

"The sun? Mmf...too early."

And with that she went to sleep again, and woke up again three hours later.

"Bleh. I don't wanna work."

She then remembered she didn't have to. More so, she couldn't.

"Damned Inuyasha."

'He did say he was sorry' she thought.

"Feh." she said as if speaking to her thoughts.

She got up and went to make breakfast. Which meant cereal.

She heard a knock on her door. 'Who the hell is that?' she thought. When she went over and looked out the window, she yelled in excitement.

"Sango!"

"Yay! Now lemme in."

"Oh. right." Kagome opened the door, and Sango brought all her bags in, with fresh airline stickers on all of them.

"So, how've you been?" Kagome asked.

"Pretty good. I've been working as a journalist for a few magazines."

"Really? That's cool!"

"What've you been up to, Kagome?"

"Well, I've been running a recording studio. You wouldn't believe the two people I have to work with. I use the word "people" loosely here. They're so weird. Like, one of them always wears this glove and some kind of bead necklace on his hand, and the other, he has long silver hair and weird ears."

"So...why do you let them work for you? You own the place, you can just fire them."

"Well...they're really, I mean, VERY good at mixing and recording, and to tell you the truth, they're what keeps my studio at the highest position in the state. When they're not breaking it."

"What do you mean 'not breaking it'?"

"Inuyasha, the silver-haired one, decided to wreck my studio yesterday when I insulted him."

"That's horrible!"

"Yeah, well...he called today and told me how to fix it. And he apologized."

"He can't be that bad then, can he?"

"I just...don't know." Kagome answered uncertainly.

Just then there was another knock on the door. Kagome went to answer it. It was Inuyasha standing there.

Inuyasha looked once at her and quickly turned away, blushing.

"What?" Kagome asked.

She looked down at herself...and realized that all she was wearing was her lingerie. She hadn't put on a bathrobe even.

"Heh." Kagome laughed nervously, now blushing also.

"Hold on a minute."

She ran to her room and put on the most covering, heaviest robe she had and went back to the door.

"Yes?" She said politely.

"Uhh..." Two more people had appeared behind Inuyasha. One was Miroku, who seemed indecently interested, and the other was a relatively short, red-haired boy.

"We have to take out all of our sick days, and personal days, and vacation days, and any other days we might have."

"Why?" Kagome asked.

"Because we're going on tour!"

"NANI?! How did you get...where...why...who..." Kagome practically yelled.

"Rolling Stone Records called me yesterday, and mailed me this list of dates. I can make 'em all!"

"How do you expect me to stay in business?" Kagome asked, panicking.

"I dunno. That's not my problem."

"Fine. I hope you have a good time. You'll probably get electrocuted by a microphone or something."

"Is that possible?" A small voice asked, coming from the small redhead.

"Yes. I've seen it happen before...what's your name?"

"Shippo. Pleased to meet you." Shippo said as he held out a bouquet of roses that had just appeared.

"Well, thank you, Shippo." Kagome said and reached for the flowers. She took them, and as she was smelling them they disappeared.

"What?" She said.

"They were an illusion." Shippo said with a proud smile.

"Hmph."

Sango walked over and spoke.

"Can someone really be electrocuted by a microphone, Kagome?" She asked.

Miroku's jaw dropped half a foot. He shut it and appeared inside, behind Sango.

Kagome's hand was a blur.

FWAP

Miroku fell over.

"What did I do?" He asked

"Of course someone can get electrocuted by a microphone." Kagome continued as if nothing had happened.

"Well, we don't want that to happen to anyone, do we? I'll bet you know how to prevent stuff like that from happening!" Sango said, a little happier than before.

"Well...yeah. I've done some touring." Kagome mumbled.

"Really?" Sango asked, "When?"

"I managed a band before I went into recording."

"You could manage Inuyasha's band!" Sango suggested.

"No way!" Inuyasha said before Kagome could talk.

"Well...we don't know much about tour-"

"Shutup." Inuyasha interrupted Miroku. "There is no way she is managing our band. She's already our boss at work...I don't want her having any more control than necessary."

"Hmph." Kagome said. "I suppose you know how to keep from getting charged for the ice under the floorboards in Chicago Stadium? How to do a headlining tour? And I'm sure you know Bobbi Cowan, Lisa Robinson, Jim Ladd, and Frank Barcelona."

"Uhh..." An uneasy Inuyasha says.

Inuyasha, Miroku, and Shippo all look at each other nervously. They look back at Kagome.

"Well, that's that." Kagome says. "I hope you have a good time. See you when you get back."

She goes to shut the door on them; it's been open the whole time.

"Wait!" Shippo says.

"Yes? Kagome asks again.

Inuyasha looks at Shippo semi-angril, and then says:

"Well...we could use your help. I suppose."

"So what are you saying?" Kagome asks, knowing full well how he will answer.

"I guess...we want you to come with us. And...manage our band."

"What's the magic word?"

Inuyasha starts to get angry, then thinks about what she said, and how much he doesn't know about touring.

He grimaces and says:

"Please...?"

"I suppose I could. If you really want me to." Kagome says with false indecision.

"Why is Shippo coming with you?" She asks.

"He's our new drummer." Miroku answers. "We fired Ed."

"Okay then! When do we leave?"

"Tomorrow." Inuyasha says. "We bought a bus. It's at my house, so be there at 10:00 sharp."

"All right!" Kagome says happily.

Inuyasha and his comrades leave. Kagome and Sango could hear Miroku's old car nearly die as it left the driveway.

"Why did you do that?" Kagome asked Sango, almost angry.

"Well, you didn't seem too opposed to the idea...In fact, I'd say you wanted to go."

Kagome blushed.

"Well, you didn't mind too much when Miroku was...ahem." Kagome said.

Now it was Sango's turn to blush.

"Hmph." Was the best response she could come up with.

"Well, we'd better get packing." Kagome said.

"Yeah, if we're going to leave tomorrow."

Sango went to get her bags, and help Kagome find her travel bags. Kagome sat down, with her head in her hands, and thought. About the tour, about the fun, the music, the...Inuyasha? Yup, she thought about that too.

__

Blue days, black nights

I look into the sky

-The love you need ain't gonna see through

And I wonder why

-The little things are finally coming true

Oh, telephone line

Give me some time

I'm living in twilight

"Kagome?" Sango called from another room. "You coming?"

"Yeah...be right there."

"This'll be fun!"

"Yeah...it will, won't it?"

"Now, do you want the blue one or the yellow one?"

"Hey! Stop going through my clothes!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Miroku's (crappy) Car

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

"Hey, what're we gonna pack?" Shippo asks.

"Umm...my guitar?" Miroku says.

"And my bass." Inuyasha puts in.

"Oh yeah! Can't forget the Ramen." Miroku adds.

"Uhh...what about clothes?" Shippo asks.

"Oh, yeah." Inuyasha and Miroku collectively mumble.

They fall silent, each in his own thoughts of the tour. Inuyasha looks out the window, and finds himself thinking of Kagome (Duh! Who else?).

__

Blue days, black nights

I look into the sky

-The love you need ain't gonna see through

And I wonder why

-The little things are finally coming true

Oh, telephone line

Give me some time

I'm living in twilight

He looks out the front windshield.

"HOLY SHIT!" He says and tackles Miroku as much as he can in a car. They just miss an 18-wheeler who was going well over the speed limit. Not that they were under it either, mind you.

"You almost killed us!" Inuyasha yelled.

"Ehh...no big loss." Miroku says calmly.

Inuyasha takes control, pulls over, and stops the car.

He kicks Miroku out and pulls away.

Miroku yells sarcastically at the receding car.

"Oh yeah! I'm not important! I'm only the fucking guitarist!!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Well, I thought that went much better than the last one. But my opinion doesn't count, soo......REVIEW THIS! Yes, I have ways of telling if you read this and review or not...eeevill ways, horrible, terrible ways. Ways that would make your skin crawl, and the hare on the back of your neck stand up and run away! Hell, you deserve it if you have a bunny on your neck. That's just plain weird. And besides, if you don't review, you will be cursed, and you will never be able to eat a Lithuanian dish in a Munster cheese sauce again! Muhuhahaha!


	4. Long Way To The Top

Nearly Famous

Chapter 4

Hiyo…I'm writing again. I decided to chain myself in the basement until I finished this chapter. Yup…so, know that any enjoyment you may get out of this is at the exclusive expense of others. Now, doesn't that make it worthwhile to read?

DISCLAIMER:I stayed up all night, wished upon a whole lot of stars, thought happy thoughts and clicked my heels three times, and even chanted ancient chants, and I still, I repeat, STILL do not own Inuyasha. Jeez, what does it take? It's like someone or something expects me to get it by hard work and perseverance. Yeah, right. That'll be the day.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^It's A Long Way To The Top^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

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A bus rumbles down the freeway, doing a good 15 mph over the speed limit. It's filled with people playing guitar, bass, singing, or just chatting. People stare in pure fear, with good reason, as the bus goes by.

Miroku was driving.

"Remind me once more how this happened?" Inuyasha asked in disbelief.

"Okay, well, first you got us pulled over for going 115 in this huge hunk of steel, then, nobody believed you when you said Miroku was a bad driver, evidently except for Shippo, but he was so scared he was hiding under the back seats. Miroku took the wheel, and it was too late before Sango and I realized our fate." Kagome explained, in between jolts from the bus' swerving, namely around other cars.

"Oh."

Inuyasha looked at Kagome, and both deciding for the good of the band, pounced on Miroku and pried him off the steering wheel. Inuyasha took control, and despite his lead foot, everyone felt a lot safer.

"Hey! What did I do?" Miroku asked

"Well, you almost killed at least forty-seven people, broke about eight laws, committed three felonies, nearly broke the bus, our only mode of transportation, barely escaped a run-in with a biker gang, did NOT escape a run-in with that other gang, which got us beat up, caused a twenty-five car pileup, and that was only ten seconds after it started, and then caused a thirty car police pileup…do you know what it takes to get thirty police chasing you in the first place? Exactly. And then, you proceeded to-"

"Uhh…okay, so I broke a law or two, swerved around some people, but we're all alright, ne?"

"Shippo has a concussion, Sango has three sprained parts, and-"

"Well, fine. But, look on the bright side. Always look on the bright side of life."

"Considering they sing that song while being crucified, I'd consider that very appropriate."

Miroku was responseless. Inuyasha turned on to a side road, and pulled into a bank that was part of the bank chain he used. They all went in, and watched as he put $200,000 in the safe box. Then they went to look for a hotel or motel to stay in. They got ripped off, but that's how it goes. After an extremely uneventful night (They all walked in, fell over, and were asleep until the next morning.), they got back into the bus. It was like their life. This was the last day of travel only; their first gig was tonight. They went back to the bank, and Inuyasha walked in. Five minutes later he came out, yelling his arse off.

"What the fuck!? Someone stole our money! We have no money! It all was stolen! All of it!"

He was practically hysterical. The rest of them didn't really notice much, it was ten in the morning. Too early. But at the mention of "money" Miroku's finely honed ultra-poor senses went into gear.

"WHAT?! NO MONEY?!"

"That's right. None. Except for what we have on us."

They all sighed…the reality kicked in. Yelling and screaming was the main concern, although kicking things angrily cut a close second.

"This was all your fault!" Kagome blamed Inuyasha

"My fault? Do you think I asked someone to steal our money? Do you think I left the safe open with TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS in it?!?"

"Well you shouldn't have trusted a safe box! If we had kept the money, we would still have it!"

"Feh. Whatever you say. I don't even want to bother, you're not worth it."

"I'll teach you!"

They had to be forcefully dragged apart before serious damage occurred.

"Guys, we need to be more responsible if we're going to go on tour!" Shippo reprimanded them.

"Excuse me?" Inuyasha said, still angry, "But didn't we all get into this to avoid responsibility?"

"Well we've got to have some…"

It took a good half hour for the band to finally work it out. What resulted from this was some pretty vulgar graffiti on the bank's wall and a very pissed, very poor band. All in all, they were piss-poor. So they drove on.

With Led Zeppelin's "Rock And Roll" blaring, the bus once again rumbled down the highway at well over the limit, this time under the control (and I do use "control" lightly) of Kagome. Control was one of the few things she did not exhibit while driving. On the other hand, she did exhibit plenty of anger, rudeness, danger, insanity, and suicidal impulses.

It was a fun bus ride. Just like in the old days at school.

After nearly dying at least twenty times, they arrived at the club, a mid-sized arena, of their first official tour concert. They unpacked their instruments and equipment, and lounged backstage, munching on snacks.

"So, how much do we make for this gig?" Kagome asked. She had taken on an "Official Manager" air.

"Uhh….not enough." Miroku said.

"Jeez, I'm trying to calculate our expenses, and you can't give me a straight answer."

"If I knew, I'd tell ya."

When the Coke machine wouldn't work, Shippo busted some moves on it, and ended up with mangled plastic that probably resembled a Coke machine before, and one icy cold soda. The rest of the band looks at him.

"What?" He asked.

They just shake their heads. This was touring. This was fame and glory. This was the great life of a rock star, even if they weren't, it could only get worse with popularity. They had almost no money, they were tired, and beaten up, and hungry. This was one of those times when you desperately wish that the owner of the gig gives the band free food.

It wasn't.

Their day couldn't have gone worse, unless, of course, Miroku had driven the bus, and now it looked as if their night was going to follow suit. The crown came dressed in some new band's shirts or goth outfits, and did NOT look like classic rockers. This was one book that had its entire text on it's cover. They weren't classic rockers. As soon as they started up the first song, the crowd booed and threw stuff at them. They had no clue why they were playing here, but the record company had said so, and so did the manager. As the crowd chanted for some 90's rock song, or some punk rock, Inuyasha said:

"This gig is going up like a brick in water."

"Hey! That's a good band name!" Shippo exclaimed.

"No, Brick is NOT a good band name." Miroku said.

"Oh. Okay."

They faced the dread of going back onstage. But, thinking of the money, they walked out and started another song. As Miroku grabbed the mic to sing backup vocals, the guitar suddenly stopped. He fell to the ground, but fell carefully so as not to wreck his guitar.

"Crap! You alright?" Inuyasha asked.

No answer from Miroku. They dragged him offstage and into the bus out back. Kagome stopped them and asked:

"What are you doing?! We NEED that money!"

"That almost killed our lead guitarist!"

"He's fine to finish the show!"

"NO. He is not! He's going to the next show, and so are we."

"You are going to finish this gig. If you don't, we won't have enough money for gas to the next gig."

"Listen, what's so hard to undersatand? We're leaving!"

"As your manager, I say no you're not!"

"Manager? What have you managed? Nothing! We took you along so you could save us money, get us into the right clubs, introduce us to the right people. We can MANAGE ourselves."

At this Inuyasha turned, fuming, into the bus and started to drive away.

"Wait!" Kagome yelled. Sango just stood next to her.

Inuyasha slowed just enough so she could get on, and shot a quick remark at her.

"I thought we were staying."

She ignored him.

Inuyasha was going at a good speed, and realized that the manager of the club had locked the gates. Here's the fun part, he thought.

"Anyone wanna buy a….HOLY SHIT!"

He stared, still accelerating.

"CONCRETE WALL!!!"

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Inuyasha woke up, and it was light out again. He looked around groggily, and said "When's breakfast?"

It came out more like "Fwehnchmmff mwekkpaffmmmmm?"

"Inuyasha, you're awake!" Miroku looked happy to see him.

Kagome, who was looking at him, looked away.

"What happened? I thought you were the one who passed out." Inuyasha asked.

"Oh, I did. But you crashed the bus, and slammed headfirst into a concrete wall."

"Oh. What happened when you got electrocuted? You were lucky to be able to let go."

"Well, it burnt. It felt like a dose of lead shooting through my body, and then…I saw God, and he said "How bad do you want to be legendary?" and God damnit, I let go."

"Rock and roll." Said Inuyasha tiredly.

"Yeah."

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

LATER THAT DAY

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Kagome had refused to drive, Shippo was sleeping, and Miroku wasn't getting within ten feet of a steering wheel while any of them were alive, so Sango drove. The bus was still going well over the limit, but that was okay. They all felt wiped out after that first gig. Kagome even thought about apologizing to Inuyasha for a minute, and then spent the other 59 minutes in an hour thinking about how to get revenge.

Inuyasha and Kagome were strictly not talking, or even looking, at each other. This meant they were both facing opposite windows of the bus, and neither of them could see Sango driving. Which also meant neither of them could see the suspiciously innocent Miroku next to her.

"Err…how's….heh…your hand?" Sango managed, rather uncomfortably.

"Fine, just fine. As a matter of fact, it's doing very well." Miroku kept that innocent look.

"Yeah, well….uhh, right."

Miroku looked very calm until Sango flashed him a smile. He then proceeded to melt into a puddle on the floor. He and Sango looked at each other, both kind of embarrassed, and said almost as much with their eyes as Inuyasha could say with two words.

"HOLY SHIT!!!"

Yeah, that said a LOT.

As Sango looked back at the road (what a novel idea, looking at the road as you drive) she saw black. And white. And bold lettering proclaiming the name of some company. She swerved about as fast as any sports car could, and somehow kept them all alive. She seemed to possess all of the driving skills that Miroku didn't. While she purposely missed the 18-wheeler, Miroku would have practically been drawn to it. That was pretty much the end of all romantic moments Miroku would ever have in a car, going over 1.738 mph. This was the speed that Inuyasha and Kagome had determined anyone could drive safely at two days ago. Today was a special day, and the next week seemed like it would be, so they temporarily reduced this speed to 0.826013 km/h2.

For the next few hours, there was conversation, but only in the sense that people were talking. There was no actual exchange of ideas, thoughts, expressions, or emotions. Hell, it was a rare moment when any of them said something that was of any intellectual value at all. For demonstrative purposes, I have entered an example of the conversation.

"Yeah."

"That was cool."

"Yeah."

"I wonder if aquariums are open on Sundays in Sweden?"

"I don't think so. I mean, look at the places. All full o' water, and fishes, and other sea-thingies. Nothing good can come of that lot."

"Off course, you never took into account whether it was a Left day or not, and how many hours from May 37th it was."

"Yes I did! I did it in my head!"

"Oh, and I suppose you know higher math!"

"What's higher math?"

"Higher math is what you gotta use when you're dealing with higher numbers, like 37."

You get the point. And with this as conversation, they came to a motel, got ripped off again, and went to their room. Nobody was tired.

"Well…this is boring as hell." Kagome said.

"Why don't you go somewhere else then?" Inuyasha challenged her.

"Like where?"

"I don't know, some bar or something."

"Hey! Great idea!" Miroku said.

Sango was desperately shaking her head and frantically signaling "NO!" to Miroku.

"What? Of course you can come with us Sango!"

She just shook her head.

Meanwhile, Shippo was looking at them. They were all over 21, he was only 19. He wasn't so sure about a bar. As they all got ready to leave, Miroku called after him.

"Hey! You coming or what?"

"But…but."

"But what?"

"But I'm not old enough to drink!"

"Nonsense. That's why I have a fake ID for you. I keep one on hand of everyone I'm traveling with. It's a good idea, learned from experience."

Wow, Shippo thought, Miroku isn't really a "clean" guy is he?

Shippo inspected him further. No, he hadn't taken a shower in a good 4 days.

"Umm…okay, I guess?" Shippo answered.

"Alright then! Lets go."

They were in a small town, and didn't need to take the bother of a bus to a nearby bar. After promptly showing legal ID (except for Shippo of course) they were granted entrance, and sat leisurely down at the actual bar. Shippo was obviously nervous, and luckily there were a lot of people or he might have drawn attention. The barmaid was a little thick, but the band got their drinks. Shippo was nervous as hell when it was his turn.

"I'll have….a…uhh…scotch on the rocks?" He asked, as if it were a question.

"Sure thing. Would you like ice with that?"

"Umm….no?"

Now Shippo was thoroughly confused, and so was the rest of the band. He had just ordered a scotch on the rocks…with no ice? They couldn't wait until his drink came. But evidently someone else thought they could. A large stranger pushed Shippo out of his seat, trying to make it look accidental and failing completely. He then called the barmaid and ordered his order exactly like this:

"HEY! Get me a scotch on the rocks. And no ice."

The band hardly stifled their laughter. Was everyone in this town so stupid? Shippo made an indignant sound and walked back as if to push this stranger out of his seat. This stranger who was twice his size. But just then, the stranger got up and moved toward Kagome and managed to ask his question just like this:

"How u doin'?"

That's right, he SAID "you" without the "y" or the "o". And he said those words with a…certain…tone.

Kagome brushed him off casually, and this was obviously something that did not happen often to him.

"What?" He said.

"I said 'keep your pants on, you clod.' Which part were you having trouble with? Was it those big words like 'on'? Or maybe it was 'you', yes, that one _can_ be troubling at times. Now buzz off."

Despite himself, Inuyasha gave way to a small smile. This was funny.

The man was now in an all-out shock and angry surprise at being rejected, and could do nothing about it, so he tore across the room and nearly fell over trying to sit down at a table. After the band had had a few drinks, he gave a smirk, and looked very proud of himself.

He walked over to the bar like a rider of the apocralypse.

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Yes, the apocralypse. Read books by Terry Pratchett, he's cool, and much better than me. Hell, he has a publishing contract!

Anyway, these aren't all gonna be songfics, as you can see, and if there's a lack of gut-splitting laughter, it's for a better cause later in the story. If you people don't review, I will make use of my aforementioned evil ways, and do things to you that you couldn't even imagine. Like replace your pinky toe with a hamburger! Yes, try to imagine THAT! Well, I'm going right on to start chap 5 now, but it might not be done for a few days. Maybe that'll give you time to REVIEW! HINT, HINT!! ^_^

To all the people who did review, thankies, and if you were scared into doing it, well…what's a few death threats between friends, right?


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